Posted in Lifestyle

Do You See What I See?

I have recently been pondering this website that I have created.  It occurred to me that one day it did not exist and then the next day it did.  Okay, it didn’t really happen quite that fast.  I spent a fair amount of time researching how to create a website, determining which platform to use, figuring out how to get hosting, etc.  But before I sat down and actually did all of the work it was only a dream of mine.  The website itself did not exist. 

This leap from nothing to something started to make me wonder about what else might be possible.  I am currently in the process of writing several children’s books.  Right now they only exist on a jump drive and in my imagination but I have tons of ideas for illustrations and I am researching how to publish them.  Sure, there is plenty of work to be done before they will become actual books but there is absolutely no doubt in my mind that they will eventually exist in the material world. 

Think about the world we live in, everything that we have, everything that surrounds us.  At one time none of it existed.  Every single thing we have was an idea first.  Every. Single. Thing.  There was an idea for a lightbulb long before a lightbulb was created through experiments and hard work.

Thoughts can become things.  If we can think it we can do it.  Clearly just thinking about something does not make it a reality.  It takes determination and hard work to create something.  But first, it takes thought.  A dream.  An idea.  It also takes a big dose of belief.  A belief that your vision is possible and that you will succeed. 

We need vision and belief because our dreams are fragile and can easily be broken.  Hold them tight and guard them because they can be squelched all too quickly.  People will tell you that your dream is impossible.  They are wrong.  People will tell you that your idea has been done before.  I say that if it hasn’t been done by you then, no, it hasn’t been done before.  Each of us adds our own special touch and uniqueness to an idea that no one else can duplicate. People will tell you many things; that that market is flooded, that the time has passed, that too many people are already doing it. I have been told that it’s nearly impossible to get a book published.  That is probably true.  It is nearly impossible.  The keyword here is “nearly”.  The definition of nearly is: very close to; almost. 

However, it is the “very close” and the “almost” that keeps me going.  Those words provide the crack in the not-quite-closed-door, the foothold on the mountainside.  That tiny space exists to be filled.  That open niche enables us to keep our dream alive because that small space is where hope lives. That small space is where faith lives.

So how do you view that dream that you are reaching for?  Do you see abundance or scarcity when you think about achieving it?  Do you see the market as flooded or do you see opportunity?

I am fortunate that I was born an optimist. My glass has always been half full.  I don’t know how to live my life any other way and I am eternally grateful for this.  When I look at the world I see abundance.  I see it surrounding me every day.  It is everywhere I look. 

Wayne Dyer was right when he said, “When we change the way we look at things, the things we look at change.” When we change the way we see the world and when we search for only the good in things and the positive in people then that is what we will find. 

As a writer, I don’t see a market flooded with books.  I see a market flooded with readers.  I see abundance and opportunity so much that I know if I continue to work hard toward my dream with unrelenting belief and faith then I can trust that I am nearly there.

Posted in Lifestyle

Once Upon A Time

Once upon a time, some twenty-odd years ago, we were looking for a rescue dog when we came across this flyer:

ENERGETIC 9 MONTH OLD LAB NEEDS A GOOD HOME; GREAT WITH KIDS; NAME: BISCUIT.   

The description along with a photo of a beautiful black Lab prompted me to call and see if the dog was still available.  The owner assured me that he was so I went that evening to see about adopting him not knowing that the word “energetic” would later prove to be an understatement.

It turned out that the owner had been caring for Biscuit since a friend could no longer keep him.  She explained that Biscuit had been living in a car for several months prior.  I couldn’t imagine this 70 lb. dog living in a car or even a bus for that matter, so I decided to take him home that night. I was so excited about our new dog that I barely noticed the owner’s overwhelming sense of relief as she quickly handed me his leash and tennis ball while ushering me out the front door.  From the porch, she gave me a quick wave good-bye and then hastily darted inside, shut the door and turned out the lights.

I arrived home early that evening with Biscuit.  After some discussion and a few protests from our 3 year old we renamed him Duke.  This was on a Thursday night.  Thursday night happened to be grocery night at our house and typically the entire family went together.  This left us in somewhat of a quandary as to what we should do with our new dog.  We certainly didn’t have a crate large enough for him yet and the idea of leaving him home alone was less than appealing.  At last, we decided we would take him along with us to the grocery.  We decided that if he were to cause any damage that the car would be a better place than our house.  Besides, we reasoned, he had been living in a car for quite some time already and would probably be very comfortable there.

Once inside the grocery store, we shopped as quickly as we could.  The entire time we were wondering if we would still have a steering wheel when we got back to the minivan.  Visions of shredded seats filled my head as we approached the van with our load of groceries and children in tow.  Amazingly enough, the van was completely intact and Duke (a.k.a. Biscuit) was quietly sitting in the back seat.   This was going much better than I had anticipated!  I loaded the children into the van while my husband opened the liftgate.  He and the bag boy proceeded to pile the groceries in the back.  Duke calmly watched until the last bag was loaded.  Then, just as my husband was closing the liftgate, Duke sprang like a gazelle from the back seat soaring neatly through the air and landing some distance from the van!

“Come here Duke!  Come here Biscuit!” we shouted as he darted in between shopping carts and cars.  My husband and the bag boy began to chase after him.  He was super fast!  (The dog, not my husband!)  He ran several laps around the parking lot amidst startled shoppers and aggravated drivers.  People called out to us and tried to nab him on his way by.  Drivers honked their horns and yelled.  After nearly ten minutes of utter chaos, Duke seemed to slow down a little and we thought we had a chance at catching him.  He approached the entrance to the grocery store and then, upon seeing my husband closing in, he stepped on the automatic door opener and ran inside!  Confused by the lights and people, he raced quickly back out the exit door on the other side of the store.  After another ten minutes or so of chasing and yelling, my husband informed the bag boy that he was done. He was exhausted and angry and calling it quits.  We were giving up and going home without the dog! 

Ironically, as my husband turned and started toward the car, the dog began to follow him.  My husband sped up.  The dog sped up!  Before my husband could make it back to the van Duke raced past him and jumped into the back seat.   He turned around, settled himself in and looked at my husband as if to say, “What are we waiting on? Are we going home or what?” The parking lot fiasco was finally over!

Thus began a thirteen-year journey with this crazy dog who would eventually wreck the neighbor’s pond, ride the kid’s school bus and bring home a half-cooked steak.  All true stories that I will save for another day.

Posted in Lifestyle

Music To My Ears

Think about a pivotal moment in your life and I bet that you will find that there is a melody attached to it.  A specific song that was playing at the time something important or exciting happened.  A piece of music devoted to a profound or melancholy experience.  Perhaps it was something that changed the way you viewed the world or significantly impacted your life.  Music has a way of forever defining a moment, a space in time, a person or an event.

From the beginning, it was always about the music for my husband and me.  It all started with a few record albums and a turntable.  My husband loves music.  When we started dating he would often play album after album for me while we sat and talked.  After we were married we continued to spend many evenings on our deck listening to music with each other or with our friends.  Often times we would take turns selecting the next album to play.  We would wait in expectation to see if the other person could guess which artist we had selected.  We would do this for hours while we discussed life and our plans for the future.

Throughout the years, the many dogs, the babies-turned-children-turned-adults, music has been constant in our home.  Neither of us can play an instrument or even sing a note but music has always been in the background of our lives.  It was not uncommon for Bruce Springsteen to wake us up early on Saturday morning.  Or for John Cougar and Lynyrd Skynyrd to work alongside us in the backyard.  U2 and Jimmy Buffet provided our entertainment on Saturday evenings. 

This past Saturday night we found ourselves on the deck once again, this time with an iPod and a blue tooth speaker.   Our daughter joined us and continued the round-robin tradition of choosing the upcoming music.  This time we each picked just one song to be played next.  Still, the three of us looked at each other in anticipation for the reaction to the next song that would be played.

My daughter’s first pick was Led Zeppelin’s Immigrant Song.   This really surprised me until she said it was in a recent soundtrack from a movie that she loved. The interesting thing about playing this quirky game is that each song is also the beginning of a conversation.  It’s an opportunity to share a memory or a story.  It is a connection that we may not have made otherwise.  It is your first high school football game.   Your first big win.  Your first big loss.  It is joy and celebration and quiet solitude.  It is all of these things rolled into a three-minute recording.

Never underestimate the power of music.  It is like therapy for your soul. It has the ability to bring us together and create bonds.  Music fuels our minds and our creativity.  Whether you listen with an iPod or you still have record albums and a turntable we all can benefit from a little background music. 

Posted in Humorous

Kitchen Intervention

Few things will cause a disturbance in the home like reorganizing the kitchen.  This may sound odd but I occasionally like to move everything in my kitchen to a new location.  It’s really just a matter of tweaking some things.  I may decide that the glasses would be better in another cabinet or the odd utensils fit better in another drawer.  I am somewhat of a neat freak and I love things organized but I never thought this was unusual or should be considered odd behavior.

My family tells another side of the story, however. They complain that they cannot find anything.   They feel that I have moved everything on purpose.  This is absolutely not true.   But it is funny.  I never realized I would find such pleasure in being the only person who knows where the egg slicer is.  The only person who can quickly find the potholders.  It gives me a sense of power and authority.

To be certain, this constant moving of kitchen items is causing my husband great stress.  He likes to cook on occasion but becomes increasingly frustrated as he opens one drawer after another in search of the spatulas.  Recently, this problem has escalated as I must confess that I am starting to forget where I moved everything.  Whereas before I could quickly spout off that the popcorn maker was definitively in the lower cabinet now I just know that I put it “somewhere”.  Still, my infatuation with moving things persists.  I know that this madness must stop.  Our marriage is on shaky ground if I move the salt and pepper shakers one more time. 

I knew that it had gone too far when I came home one day and my family was gathered around the table.  They asked me to sit down.  With a somber look on their faces, they said that I must curb my desire to relocate the silverware and frying pans.  It was at that moment that I realized I had a problem.  They say that’s the first step in the recovery process.  Since the kitchen intervention I have come up with a solution and I have agreed to go cold turkey and stop moving things at home.  Things are improving and everyone seems to be much happier now.

My solution you ask? Have I mentioned that there’s a kitchen at my office?  Why, yes, there is. I believe it is in need of some reorganization.  Nothing too big.  It’s really just a matter of tweaking some things.

Posted in Lifestyle

Just Say the Word

I credit my mother with my love of reading.  When I was young she would take my sister and me to the public library on a regular basis.  I loved everything about the library.  The quiet refuge.  The smell of the books.  I could stay all day reading the titles and devouring the book covers.

I remember getting my own library card and standing at the counter waiting anxiously for the librarian to check us out.  Meticulously, she would tuck each date stamped card into the rightful book and then she would slide the stack across the counter to me.  I remember standing there tip-toed in order to reach them.

I know that this early love of reading was where my fascination with words began.  The meaning of words.  Finding new words. Getting excited about interesting words that I had never heard before.  As I read I found that words could create fantastic images. That they had the power to transport you to another place and another time.  That time could actually stand still.

I truly believe that words have power.  They have the power to lift us up and inspire us.  They have the power to tear us down and destroy us. 

Dr. Maya Angelou said that “Words are things. Be careful about the words you use or the words you allow to be used in your home.”

Her words remind me to pay close attention to what I say.  To be careful about the words that I put out into the world.  To be mindful of how my words will be heard and remembered. 

As a writer, I am always searching for the perfect words.  The exact right thing to say.  I am finding out, however, that there are no right or perfect words.  There are only words that I prefer more than others.  My hope is that the words I choose, my words, will lift up and inspire those around me. 

Posted in Humorous

Something Fishy

Dinner time has morphed over the years since we have gotten married.  In our newlywed days, I served hamburger helper on TV trays.  When we started a family I knew I would have to start cooking “real dinners”, however, when our children were still young I was often pressed for time and I would need to prepare something that was quick.

It was during those early days that I introduced my family to the almighty fish stick.  More than just a crunchy vehicle for tartar sauce I felt that it was an ingenious part of American cuisine.  A wondrous food that was inexpensive and easy to prepare.  Something that everyone would eat without complaint. A glorious golden stick of fish that was tasty and, darn-it, downright American!  Serving this iconic food while humming a few bars of “America the Beautiful” I felt that I would have made June Cleaver proud.

It was just one such Thursday evening that I had prepared a scrumptious meal of fish sticks when I noticed my eldest daughter made a face at the table.  Being the Picky-Pearl that she was, I ignored her and continued conveying the remaining dinner items to the table.  Within minutes she began gagging and appeared to be on the verge of getting sick.  No stranger to the symptoms of Picky-Pearl-itis, I calmly told her to stop and finish her dinner.  She replied that “it tasted bad – like fish scales.”  Assuming that she was exaggerating and knowing that she had never eaten fish scales and therefore couldn’t make that assessment I told her again to eat her fish sticks.

After finally getting everything on the dinner table, I sat down.  I looked over at my husband. He had a very odd look on his face.  It was quickly changing color to a sort of sickly pale green.   He looked as if he might choke, and then, he too began to gag.  “This. Fish. Is. Bad.” he managed to croak.  “Really. Bad.”  My youngest daughter sat frozen at the table not daring to take a bite.  As a witness to this fish-stick-fiasco, she was now looking apprehensively at me. “You try it mom!” she blurted out.

Now I love America and I love fish sticks but I know when to cut bait and that time was now.  I stood and quickly cleared everyone’s plates.  I dumped the offending fish down the disposal.  This particular dinner was over.  I did what any respectable mother would do.  I promptly called Dominos for delivery. 

“One large pepperoni pizza, please.  Hold the anchovies!”

Posted in Humorous

Cirque du Bauer

In case you missed it, the circus was recently in town.  Cirque du Bauer opened just two days after the fourth of July.  The show, while not performed under a Big Top, was still quite entertaining as it involved the staining of our deck.  Most of this project was already done, however, what was left was tricky!  Meaning that everything that we couldn’t quite reach, anything that required us to either hang from a precipitous angle like circus acrobats or mandated us to move an extension ladder back and forth like circus clowns anticipating a jumper from a burning tower, was what we had left to complete.

Make no mistake, however, this was a legitimate production.  There were animals, stunt-men, high-flying acrobats, clowns and jugglers!  All of this accompanied by excitement and food!  Everything you would expect at a real circus! 

Let’s start with the not-so-wild-animals.  The dogs.   Smarter than their human counterparts, they refused to venture outside.  While the temperature soared to 104 and the humidity climbed to 100 percent, they stayed safely within the confines of the cool living room.  Periodically, we would try to coax them out of their natural habitat.   Tentatively, they would poke their heads out the back door and then look at us as if to say, “you have got to be kidding me” before ducking back in and sprawling across the closest AC vent.

My husband was part stunt man, part acrobat.  He performed daring acts on the ladder and fearlessly shimmied across the beams on the underside of the deck.  Arms out-stretched, paintbrush gripped tightly between his teeth, he made his way across as I closed my eyes and prayed! The only thing missing was the popcorn!

Next, he and my daughter juggled a 12 foot extension ladder from one side of the deck to the other.  Working slowly and methodically they painted from end to end.  The only trouble they encountered was when I came to “help” them.  Send in the clowns.  Diligently they explained, what seemed to me, a very complicated ladder-moving-process.  I listened intently, then, I grabbed my end of the ladder.   When they went left, I went right.  When they moved up, I moved back.  Apparently, I must be ladder-challenged.  Exasperated and tired of dealing with me they gave me a new job. 

I was promoted to Head of Music Production and Catering.  Basically, my new job was to turn on the radio and get lunch for everyone.  After fiddling with the radio for several minutes, I settled on a classic rock station.  I found the genre fitting as Eddie Money shouted: “Gimme Some Water”.  Dripping sweat in the sweltering heat, I had to agree with Eddie.  I went to get some cold drinks for everyone and was finally able to coax the dogs outside.

Once back on the job, I was allowed to paint the bottom edges of the deck.  I actually managed to paint more of myself and the dogs than the deck.  We now have black labs instead of yellow.  I knew it was time to call it quits when the radio blared Molly Hatchet’s “Flirtin with Disaster”. I decided this was my cue. I turned off the radio and we called it a day. The circus has moved on for now. Until the next project that is.

Posted in Lifestyle

High Five

I go to a boot camp class during the week.  I like the people there and the way that they support each other.  My daughter has been with me several times and seems to like the class as well except for one thing, the “high fives”.  Yes, I said high fives.  In this class, you are encouraged to give each other a high five at the end of a set of exercises or after hitting a goal or just as a way to motivate others.

Personally, I am a fan of the high five.  It makes me feel connected to those around me, that we share a common goal.  It gives me a sense that we are all in it together.  My daughter, however, feels differently. She is totally focused on her workout and prefers no interruptions.  She feels that giving a high five is not genuine and is not the way she would typically inspire others.

She pointed out to me that you communicate with others the way you want to be communicated to.  For example, if you are motivated by working hard, you will most likely work hard to be an example to inspire others.  I hadn’t really considered this before and it made me start thinking about motivation in general.

Motivation is a tricky thing.  We spend a lot of time reading articles and watching videos in an effort to find motivation.   Reading and learning about something new is great but most of this type of inspiration is short lived.  It’s not until we apply what we have learned that we can find true inspiration.

The interesting thing about motivation is that it is a result of action, not the cause of it.  By taking action, by creating things and even by making mistakes, we find the momentum to move forward.  An object in motion tends to stay in motion, right?  Starting is always the hardest part of the process.  Once you have started it’s much easier to keep going.

Yes, we may find inspiration in other people’s ideas, but the real power is within your own doing.  Combine your ideas with action.  Bring your ideas to life and incorporate them into your work.  Learn a new skill and then create something with it. 

Once you’ve got the motivation going, I’ll leave it up to you to decide whether or not a high five is in order.

Posted in Lifestyle

Gone Fishin’

Today was a good day.  A relaxing day.  A chance to visit with friends and enjoy the holiday.  I also got to spend a little time fishing. This quiet time with a fishing pole in your hand is a rare opportunity to feed your soul.  It’s peaceful and it gives you time to think.  Today, I thought about my dad as I cast my line into the water.

My dad loved to fish and he took me and my sister often.  Sometimes these trips were planned and we would sit by the shore fishing and eating bologna sandwiches. But, often times they were unplanned.  These impromptu fishing excursions were just quick stops by the side of the road.  Dad would pull the car over by a nearby creek and say “we’ll just stop for a minute to see if anything bites”.  His tackle box and rod were always in his car “just in case”. Of course minutes would turn to hours, but it was a wonderful time with my father that I will never forget.

My dad taught me how to bait a hook and cast a line.  But he also taught me how to drive a car, how to stick up for myself, how not to wear my heart on my sleeve, how to be kind and giving.  How to be true to your word.  To always say please and thank you.  To always be honest.  Not to lie or steal. To be fair and to put other people first. I know that many of these things are very basic but they are also essential.  And to my father they were non-negotiable.  I think we could use a little more of that in the world today.

Today, as I sat by the water, I missed him more than ever. He has been gone for three years now.  But I also smiled as I threw out my line.  I heard him whisper clearly in my ear, just as I did so many years ago. “Reel it in a little slower.” and “Just have a little patience.” And for just a moment I fishing with my dad again. And that made me smile.

Posted in Lifestyle

Everything Changes

Everything changes.  All of the time.  Our children grow up, we change jobs, we move to new locations.  Big changes, little changes, subtle changes – all can cause some upheaval or chaos.  We can be resistant to change but we cannot stop it.

I wonder, however, what if there was no change in our lives?

Without change, I wouldn’t have known what it was like to be a mother. 

Without change, I wouldn’t have developed all of the amazing friendships I have.

Without change, I would still be stuck thinking about starting a website someday.

I believe that our intuition, our inner voice, guides us toward change.  It nudges us, it gives us hints and funny feelings. 

Much of the time, however, we aren’t listening.  We busy ourselves, we ignore our hunches and we resist the very change that might be just what we are looking for.  I believe that we all have an incredible inner wisdom, we just need to practice listening to it.

Consider this:

“To become a butterfly, metamorphosis is necessary.  If the caterpillar never went through this process of change, it would never achieve its great destiny and become its most glorious self.”

“What if that change you’re avoiding is the one that gives you wings?”