Posted in Lifestyle

Why Not Whisper?

Last weekend I attended a wedding where the officiant shared stories about the bride and groom.  He spoke of typical things like where they grew up and how they met but he also shared a little anomaly between them.  Apparently, whenever they are alone together, they whisper to one another.  They carry out their conversations in hushed whispered tones.

The officiant did not offer any explanation as to why they do this or how it came about, however, it was mentioned that they both came from very large families where I assume life was rather noisy at times.  I know, coming from a somewhat large family myself, how loud things can be in certain instances.

When I heard this interesting fact about this couple though, I was intrigued and couldn’t get the image out of my mind.  I began thinking about the instances in which we whisper.  Of course, my first thought was that we whisper when we have a secret to tell.  But my second thought was that we whisper when we have something very important to share.  And then I thought about the effort it takes to hear someone who is whispering.

To hear a whisper, we must first quiet ourselves.  We must stop doing what we are doing.  We must stop thinking what we are thinking. We are forced to unplug and place our full attention on the whisperer.  We might even need to focus on the shapes that they make with their mouths to better understand what they are saying.

The more I thought about this newly wedded whispering couple, the more beguiled I became. But isn’t exquisite attentiveness almost always present in new beginnings?  Wouldn’t it be perfectly fitting to start your life together on the soft wings of a whisper?

Perhaps we should start a National Whisper Day.  One day a year where everyone must intentionally whisper to one another wherever they go.  Whether it’s ordering coffee or picking up dry cleaning.  How many intentional conversations might be started if we were forced to whisper and, consequently, be forced to listen?  Imagine what might happen if we truly listened to those around us for an entire day.  I think we might be astounded at what we would hear.

This weekend I attended the funeral of a good friend of ours.  There were lots of people there.  And there was quite a bit of whispering too.  Whispered sentiments of love and support.  Important whispers of shared stories and quiet laughter. Final whispers that paid tribute to one, all-too-short, lifetime.  

It occurred to me that humans are the only animals who whisper.  Who have the ability to quiet themselves and comprehend when their human counterparts are in need.  Who have the capacity to truly listen to one another whether it be in our beginnings or in our endings.  Or even, most especially, in our middle places. Those places between the special beginnings and sorrowful endings where an unexpected whisper truly means the most.

Photo courtesy Pixabay/AlejandroTuzzi

Posted in Lifestyle

Hope Is Not A Strategy!

No, hope is not a strategy. It is so much more.

We have all heard the phrase “hope is not a strategy” or “hope is not a plan” and I completely understand the intent behind it.  That planning is more important than unrealistic ideas.  That it is better to be prepared than to simply wish for an outcome. 

The problem with this way of thinking is our current definition and understanding of hope.  Hope is commonly used to mean a wish with a strength that is only as strong as a person’s desire.  Hope is often devalued or even dismissed.

A strategy is a plan of action designed to achieve an overall aim.  It generally involves setting goals and priorities and describes how these things will be achieved.  It is a framework for making decisions. 

Yet, even the best strategies may not see the light of day without a generous helping of hope. Hope is the feeling of expectation and desire for a certain thing to happen.  It is an expectation with confidence.  Hope is more than a wish for things to get better, it is the actual belief, the knowledge that it will no matter how big or small the circumstance.

Hope provides the momentum behind the strategy.  It makes us believe in what is possible rather than what is probable.  Hope is much like a root of a plant that lies below the surface of the soil providing nutrients to the plant so that it may grow. It is vital to the growth of the plant yet it is unseen. Hope resides in each one of us in this same way. It is at our very core. It keeps us grounded and sustains us.

Hope tells us to believe in something greater than ourselves. Hope tells us that we are possible.  That our grandest dreams are possible.  That all is not lost. That no matter what, no matter our losses, no matter our suffering, no matter our circumstance, there are better days ahead.  

Hope has the ability to pull us through the darkest of nights and the deepest of despair. Hope has the ability to free us from the chains of insecurity and fear because it is based in something so much larger. 

Hope is based in love.  

So, while hope is most assuredly not a strategy, it is the key ingredient to a successful plan.  And, make no mistake, hope is not complacent.  Hope is alive. Hope is seeking.  And, hope is believing.